Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[nashy]

@Allanah  Perspective is incredible isn't it. Also sometimes people slightly external have fresh eyes and may even have a new strategy or resource we have not considered! I think that's why this forum is such a valuable place as we have hundreds & hundreds of fresh eyes 

[nashy]

"guilty" you and "rational" you. I love this @au_gust  Segregating these inner personas can help gain clarity, that's a very good strategy thanks for sharing.

[Shaz51]

@au_gust, @Allanah , @Jo , @nashy 

that is why I have found the sane forum soo helpful , to know that someone has gone through some of what we have been throught

[Determined]

Hi @Shaz51 

@nashy ... point 3...

Yeah... patiently waiting for the majic answer here lol. 

[nashy]

Hey @Determined  Haha offsetting the guilt? It's definitely no quick fix. Although I have heard some carer's using mindfulness to combat guilt. I know the mindfulness thing is a bit eye-rolley for some, but I suppose allowing ourselves that time to sit with just the awareness as an observer is the quickest way to access the reality of the situation. The Smiling Mind app is a good'en 

[Jo]

Thanks Nashy.

 One good way of releasing feelings of guilt, self-blame and anger is to express them by writing them down. I think it's healthy to have an exercise book and pen handy when negative emotions and thoughts tend to take over. You can pour everything out in writing knowing that nobody else will ever read it. So you can be brutally honest, including expressing feelings of anger and frustration at others. I also encouraged my son to release his feelings via len and paper and would like to share this picture he drew to describe what it's like to be heavily depressed.

[Jo]

Correction : 'pen and paper', not 'len and paper'.

[nashy]

Thank you for sharing @Jo  Your son is talented. Really appreciate your insight tonight thank you 🙂  

On the concept of Carer>Loved One relationship. Let's move to discussion point number 4 (Second last one for the night!).

How can we communicate our emotions with the loved one in which we care for? What are some ways we can collaborate more with our loved one throughout the journey? 

For example - family therapy, designated weekly debriefs over coffee on how you're both travelling.. etc 🙂

[Determined]

Thanks @nashy I will check that out.

My comment would have been more in context if I was here from the start but oh well. We were out of town and not long arrived home.  In the eye of a storm so to say  at the moment so all a bit hard to get my head around just now. 

[nashy]

No problem @Determined  🙂 Happy to have you in the eye or either side of the storm as always 😄