@Dimity 

Sorry to hear about your sister, and her level of unwellness.  Hearing you about the histotical trauma that leads to these situations.  I am better at taking care of the house and others, than myself, but I will jump in shower before I go out tonight to rehearsal.  I am not sure how long it is been ... my mind echoes with only bathing once per week .. memories rather then memes ... and it has been very cold. 

Listening to Bob Carr and John Anderson ... ex Aussie... both sides of ... pollies ... not sure about much ....  but not deliberately vague or euphemistic, rarely deliberately anything except for keeping on.  Holding breath was a problem diagnosed once by a pdoc who also did bioenergetics.  It was an unconscious habit. So since then ... I have consciously done a lot of breath regulation activities ... swimming, singing, wind instruments and meditation .... no ... dont hold your breath unless you really want to.

Knowing what to do regarding unwell close family members has stretched me all my life, from childhood, through young adulthood, middle age, and now into old age.  It is hard when she goes into helplessness mode.  I am changing my use of NDIS as I felt pushed into a more and more helpless obedience, which was not healthy for me ... what to do ... what to do ... having reasonable expectations ... what are they ...

Take care

Hugs Apple