SANE Forums

[outlander]

Hi everyone

i suffer from an eating disorder and im getting better at managing my emotions and thoughts around food but im having a major challange and wonder if anyone else could provide some advice. 

i have to have alot of medical procedures which usually involves requiring support workers here and there and often overnight for some things. 

2 things i really struggle with is

1- discussion around food/drink in any form that includes just being asked what i feel like to eat or what my likes/dislikes are 

2- eating in front of people in most respects 

Im just wondering if there are some suggestions on ways to approach this with support workers when im required to have some care and they ask what i feel like for dinner etc?  i find the whole topic incredibly uncomfortable but im not to sure how to approach it because even the thought of mentioning to them that i have an eating disorder or talking about meals is quite hard and triggering for me. 

would anyone be able to provide some advice on how i might communicate my needs without being triggerred all the time?

i am working on this with a psychologist but my current one is away at the moment and i wont have a chance to communicate before my next procedure that ill need support with which will mention food, cooking etc 

[Captain24]

Hey @outlander 

Would writing it down be easier for you?

Maybe just that the talk of food makes you uncomfortable without going into to much detail? 

sorry. That’s all I got

[Asgard]

Hi @outlander 

Nice to meet you.  Been thinking about your issue and the only thing that comes to mind, is if you have already decided what you want to eat, just to state it out loud.

Could you take your support worker into your confidence and just tell them that talking about food does your head in,

Regarding eating in front of others have you tried CBT, it trains you in new ways to react to this situation, it is very helpful I have found.  I used to be very socially awkward and CBT has trained me to think of social situations in new ways which are less stressful.  Give it a go, nothing ventured nothing gained...........Asgard

[outlander]

hey @Captain24
i think maybe writing it down for the company to notify staff might be helpful so i dont have to have the conversation with each of them so that could work.

[outlander]

hi @Asgard
nice to meet you

Ive got a couple of different support workers depending on whose avaliable etc but i think emailing the company just to explain might be helpful as talking outloud sends me into a spin.

maybe a small list of menu items would help instead of them asking what i feel like i can just give them the safe go to meals so they dont have to ask as whatever is on the safe list i will generally have at any time without any issues unless im feeling sick

i have a psychologist who is helping me but its slow because even talking about it with her makes me feel very awkward even though eating really is a necessity and a normal part of life but it is one thing that makes me uncomfortable

[Bow]

I think what you have replied to @Asgard  here @outlander  is a pretty good approach to take. Always trying to communicate, if written is easier, is going to be your best friend. They can’t help if they don’t know. 

do you need to be watched while eating? Like is that an issue? Not finishing food? 

good luck!

[Owlunar2]

Hi @outlander 

I don't have an eating disorder still I don't like discussing my diet with anyone else - and I prefer to eat only my own cooking - so I get what you are saying - I understand

Emailing your agency and telling them this is a good idea - if you are uncomfortable talking about food - that's okay - and pretty normal imo - but yes - it makes you feel icky so don't.

You do have a lot happening in your life - it's a lot to cope with - I wish you the best and think you are pretty okay and cope well with your situation.

It's not easy though

All best and feel okay with yourself

Owlunar

[outlander]

I dont need to be watched or anything like that @Bow just reminded.
its actually just being in the presence of someone else ie going out to a cafe for lunch or just watching a movie while having dinner. They are normal things for most people and because after treatments im usually required to have care afterwards for a min 24 hours it usually will involve having lunch out or the support staff cooking dinner and having dinner with me while watching a movie etc.

[outlander]

@Owlunar2
thank you. yes food and talk surrounding that makes me feel uncomfortable even though someone asking what id like for dinner etc is a normal thing because i do the same to my own clients but it still is hard for me to do

[Asgard]

Hi @outlander 

Emailing menus sounds like a great idea, maybe you could call each different meal by a number, so you could say I'll have number 3 please today.  Just thinking that you could do that with everything with food, instead of the name see it as a group of numbers, looking at it from a slightly wierd perspective.  Anyways let us know how you are doing...........Asgard