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03 Mar 2025 05:27 PM
03 Mar 2025 05:27 PM
03 Mar 2025 05:39 PM
03 Mar 2025 05:39 PM
@Blackcloud no matter what - nothing is written in stone hun. I used to believe the same, with every fibre of my being I was convinced I was undesirable and unworthy of love and connection. And the more I believed this fact, the more I shut myself down to any oppportunities for the opposite to be true. Bit hard to be open to friendships when I was acting as though I was never going to make a friend, cos that's what I thought was the truth!
You never know what lovely little opportunities for connection life might throw your way, just gotta keep an eye out for em!
03 Mar 2025 05:57 PM - edited 03 Mar 2025 05:59 PM
03 Mar 2025 05:57 PM - edited 03 Mar 2025 05:59 PM
@Jynx I mean I’ve had selective mutism along with extreme social anxiety ever since I was really young. And I believe that having selective mutism has always been the root cause behind as to why despite the fact that I’ve already tried joining so many social groups and clubs within the past year & past months to try and ‘connect’ with people, I just never seem to at least be able to form a connection with anyone, not even with one single person so far. I still have issues with forming coherent sentences whenever I talk to people so there’s that too.
Also, the fact that my mum keeps telling me these days that I need to put myself out there and talk to anyone, smile at them etc. Etc. when she’s already well aware of my history with all of the issues I’ve been having ever since I was really young, but yet she believes that changes like these can happen quickly. No it doesn’t. It takes like many years, or even decades for the change to happen as it varies for everyone depending on how much they’ve been struggling, how often they continue to seek professional help with the issues they have & how they think and see things in general based on their prior personal experiences.
I do feel that the reason why my mum wants me to do this is obviously because she wants me to have a boyfriend and be in a relationship. She even said that I should talk to anyone even if it’s boys too… and the fact that I WILL need to continue to yell at her and be angry at her everytime she comes out with something that I don’t even agree with at all all because she’s trying to put pressure on me with it. It’s sickening to know that this is the mindset she has. She thinks that people should start be in a relationship when they’re in their 20s.
03 Mar 2025 06:01 PM
03 Mar 2025 06:01 PM
i know it's not easy to have hope, especially when you've had some low patches @Blackcloud but we truly believe in you. you are capable and worthy of making new friends - and the ones you've made here are proof that you can make more. please do be easy on yourself, its okay to take some time to figure it out.
also sending y'all some positive vibes and love @Former-Member @creative_writer @Blackcloud 💙
03 Mar 2025 06:04 PM
03 Mar 2025 06:04 PM
03 Mar 2025 06:09 PM
03 Mar 2025 06:13 PM
03 Mar 2025 06:25 PM
03 Mar 2025 06:25 PM
@Blackcloud omg that's an exciting change!!! how are you feeling about it? what sort of stuff does fine arts include, is there a particular subject/area you're studying?
03 Mar 2025 06:26 PM
03 Mar 2025 06:26 PM
Daww bless @avant-garde did I miss much last week? How you been travelling?
03 Mar 2025 06:32 PM
03 Mar 2025 06:32 PM
You absolutely missed a lot, namely hearing about the massive amounts of idiots trampling on my mood and steamrolling my boundaries.
I also learned that my inner child is quite attached to you because she finds you fun and the pillow fight was her idea
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