Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[PlantLady]

Hey @Former-Member thanks for checking in, 

to be honest I'm going through a bit of a rough patch myself, so I haven't been on here for a while. 

I've just graduated university, and going through a bit of an identity crisis  Finding it hard to get motivated or to enjoy things.

My previous counsellor has moved overseas, so I have recently started seeing someone new, but that seems to be going pretty well so far. I definitely didn't realise how valuable having a good counsellor was until I started seeing my current one. 

I've struggled so far with meditation and mindfulness, but I'm not giving up yet!(so if you have any tips, please let me know 🙂

My partner Nick is doing well at the moment, a few small surges in hallucinations etc. due to stress from his university exams, but he's handling it really well. 

How are you going?

Love,

Plantlady

[PlantLady]

Hey @Tictac , 

I hope you're going ok.

I'm always up for a chat 

Love, 

Plantlady xxx

[Former-Member]

Hi @PlantLady 

Congratulations on graduating.

MI can be overwhelming for family and adjustments can take time. Once I understood this, I didn't put any pressure on Mr Darcy or myself and  I am finding joy again. One thing I did not lose was my sense of humour and remain thankful for so many things.

I am afraid I am not the best person to ask about meditation and mindfulness, it is not my cup of tea.

[PlantLady]

Thank you @Former-Member 

I'm glad you're finding joy again. 

[Former-Member]

I hope that you do too @PlantLady 

[outlander]

hi @PlantLady
im also in my early 20s so can probably relate to some of the challenges you face as a young carer as well.
well done on graduating too, that's fantastic!

just wanted to check in to see how things are going for you?

[PlantLady]

Hi @outlander,

things are going ok at the moment. 

My partner is pretty stable at the moment, and he's in a good routine. He's been very aware of old habits (eg: isolating himself or procrastinating) and has been able to get himself out of those habits when they sneak in. I'm really happy with how well he is handling himself and his symptoms. He's doing well with his study and seems really motivated. 

I'm struggling a little with our current living situation. We both live at our parents' houses, but they are an hour and a half drive apart. At the moment I'm scheduling my activities around his (eg: Volunteering 2 days a week at the same times that he's at uni) so that I have as much free time to spend with him and to help him study etc. It usually ends up that we spend 3 days together at one house, then 2 days apart, then 3 days at the other house. I'm getting to the point of my personal development where I want to commit to more of my own activities (get a new job or volunteer more, set a routine at the gym, join a social group, etc.) so I need to restructure this schedule somehow.

I miss the independence of living together, but I know it wouldn't work right now, and it's not what's best for either of us. I'm really trying hard with my own personal development, but I find my self frustrated by lack of energy and sometimes I feel like I'm not getting anywhere.

I saw my GP on an unrelated note, and they ended up booking me in for an assessment to do a mental health care plan for myself.  I feel a bit conflicted because I'm already seeing a counsellor,  but at the same time, I feel like I do need a bit more support at this time. Now that my partner seems stable, a lot of my own mental health issues seem to be coming back. I've been feeling depressed and anxious, and it's just frustrating, like I just want to live my life and do things I enjoy, but I don't enjoy anything at the moment. 

sorry for the long ramble 

How are things going for you @outlander?

[outlander]

hi @PlantLady
im glad to hear things are relatively stable and your partner seems to be doing well too.

I can see how the living situation would be affecting you. it difficult to try and work around everything.
Maybe with the extra support you could work on how to move forward with your own personal development and ways to do that.

Sometimes we aren't as aware of our own needs mentally physically etc when we are so focussed on another person. now that hes stable and your not having to worry so much your able to notice what you need abit more. Nothing wrong with getting those extra supports in place for yourself.
Its hard to live when we don't enjoy anything or feel motivated to do anything. hopefully as your own mental health stabilises youll find those joyous moments again

I am super busy atm. today was a quieter day but still got some things sorted. tomorrows busy though as is the next few weeks while I arrange things before I have an operation.

[PlantLady]

Hi @outlander , 

Thanks for checking in on me and thanks for your kind words. 

I hope you get everything done that you want to, and hope your operation goes well 

[outlander]

your welcome @PlantLady and thank you