I have read @Faith-and-Hope that you have completed your studies for the year. A belated congratulations, you little star you. How you managed to semi-concentrate is beyond the workings of my brain. I hope you do something nice for yourself this weekend @Faith-and-Hope .
There has been no mention of marriage counselling so I am assuming the split is irreconcilable. Lots of people have been doing it tough this year, mental health wise, physical health wise and with long term relationship breakdowns. Everyone appears to deal with it in their own way. Some people throw themselves out there immediately on online dating, and others retreat into the sanctuary of their mind and friends and family, once bitten twice shy sort of thing, not to mention the ballooning trust issues.
There's no easy path, it is all hard and can be a slow process. If the relationship really hurt your self-esteem, confidence or trust in life itself, I think they are the hardest ones to get over.
I was thinking of borrowing Fake from the library by Stephanie Wood, not that this has any relevance to your situation whatsoever, but even successful and intelligent people can fall prey to someone that treats them with contempt & deception.
I guess it is human nature to want to be loved and connected and I think that loneliness can reel us into situations that we wouldn't have chosen if we weren't experiencing loneliness. But you can be even more lonely in a relationship than single, because if you are being actively rejected every day, living with someone that is dispassionate about you, would be soul destroying. I'd rather get a puppy.
It's still early days but just getting through your course and submitting your assignments is a HUGE achievement and you should be proud of yourself F&H
13 hours ago
Thanks a mill @Corny, and for the book idea .... I probably need to get back to reading something that isn’t for uni.
My ex (of only four weeks) is already heavily involved with someone else, so yeah .... no .... not even a thought to marriage counselling.
Had some breakthrough discussions tonight as a family though .... 👍 Finding the way forward.
11 hours ago
one step at a time my friend @Faith-and-Hope
sending you and your children lots of tender hugs
7 hours ago
Lots of mixed emotions @Faith-and-Hope relief and sadness and anger, just to name a few. You know in your heart when it is over, despite him being with someone else some people would still try and rekindle the marriage, but I don't get the sense that you are that type of person.
Breakthrough talks can give some comfort in that you begin to see a way forward, as you say. It will be a slow process after such a long time together but you will get there, with some bumps along the way
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